While on the phone with Colleen, I was able to talk about tough stuff. Baby stuff…or rather no baby stuff without letting my emotions take over me. It wasn’t a long conversation, but she was asking how it was going and what has been done the far. She said to me “You’d think it would be easy for them just to find something! Can’t they just run a blood test and figure it out?” I 100% agree and told her that is one of my main sources of frustration in this process, because that’s how I tend to see it too. Why can’t they just pinpoint something! Anything! Then just…ya know…fix it.
On the ride from Manhattan to Cawker City, I decided to bring up a few conversations with Drew. I wanted to know is true thoughts on potential big plans for next summer. His hesitations. If he sees any positives. I tried to approach this in an unbiased way. Not convincing him one way or another, but just to truthfully get a feel for what he thought. After a while, I transitioned the conversation asking how he felt about our communication as a married couple. At times I feel he give me a “this is what I think Shannon wants to hear” answer rather than a simple truthful answer. I don’t think he does this on purpose and I can spot these responses most often. Both conversations were slightly uncomfortable, but in a good way. I was able to stay calm and not let my emotions take over. That seemingly small thing kept the conversation going down what I think was the right path.